Today, marking the terrorist attacks of September 11, it was no surprise that facebook lit up with pictures and thoughts in remembrance of the victims of September 11th. Personally, I never connected with remembering September 11th through social media. We all know what we were doing the moments we heard. We all remember the unity and the nationalism that took place in its aftermath. September 11th remains a day of national unity for us, some of us go to ceremonies and some of us go on facebook.
Now, here is where it gets interesting. While I was scrolling this morning I came upon this post: “You know your finally Israeli when you dont know the date equals 9/11 as an event until it turns usa hours and then it starts to show on your newsfeed. Unfortunately, here in Israel, we have terror attacks all the time, probably a rocket JUST shot into the south...”. So I am sure that she did not mean it for it to sound the way it came out, but it got me thinking and hey-Yeah I may get unfriended over this post, but who cares.
My Goucher, University of Leeds and Brandeis Education in International Relations, Political Science and Global Studies all of a sudden resurfaced into my brain. I suddenly saw myself sitting in class while studying abroad and talking about British Nationalism. What is nationalism? What makes people come together as a nation?
My second thought came as a Zionist. This comment was obviously not said to create uproar in my head, but it did it anyways. Is this the ultimate feeling of what it is to be Israeli? Now a question to all of you who made aliyah: When did you finally feel Israeli?
Then my thoughts floated to the diversity of the people of Israel. People come from everywhere- India, Ethiopia, Syria, Jordan, South Africa, the UK, Ireland, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Morocco, Yemin, Russia, Poland, the United States- 6 Continents worth of individuals making up the Israeli identity. You cannot tell me that it is easy to forget where you come from. If it is not your voice, then maybe it is the way you behave, maybe it is the music that is played at a simcha, and maybe it is your family’s history, your grandmother’s stories. You cannot assume a new identity without taking bits of the past with you.
I was told I was Israeli by a mean customs agent at Ben Gurion Airport. He told me to get a passport or I would be in trouble. I spent a lot of my teen years trying to make sense of the passport given to me. I tried everything, fisherman pants, learning Hebrew, I made some of the best sabra friends a person could ever ask for. I stayed in Israel after hanging out in bomb shelters in Haifa in 2006. In college I debated in favor of Israel against anti Israeli groups on campus, yet, it wasn't until recently where I decided I felt like an Israeli Citizen. It was when I went to Israel, with my American husband and we stood in line together. It was a collection of my past with my future.
I would hope that it was not becoming accustomed and apathetic to terrorist attacks that took a person to feel Israeli. The same as I hope it would not take September 11th for Americans to feel American. My hope that it would be from the unity of the people, being thrown off an Israeli bus, being pushed out of line, being yelled at a gas station, smelling the fresh challot in the shuk, hiking, swimming, teaching, learning, serving your time in the Israeli army, praying- anything but being apathetic to terrorist attacks.
This is where I come back to September 11th, I believe September 11th was the first time in recent history that Americans could relate to terrorist attacks in Israel. It was the first time that there was a shared pain and a shared sense of pride in our identities. It is bothersome to think that someone would feel they have finally assumed the identity of an Israeli, because they are simply used to terrorist attacks and forgot about the significance of September 11th in the United States until once her friends woke up.
I know that the Sabra stereotype has not died out. Israelis are strong for what they face every day. They are strong for all the events in the past, but I do not think that there is one person who I know in Israel or in the United States that does not remember the feeling of loss and who does not soften up a little to remember.
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
My Response to Unorthodox: The Scandalous Rejections of my Hasidic Roots - Transforming a Grain of Salt into a Mound of Sugar
Transforming a Grain of Salt into a Mound of Sugar
After a lovely Shabbat dinner, we are sitting together on the couch avoiding one topic, the book: Unorthodox: The Scandalous Rejections of My Hasidic Roots, by Deborah Feldman. Finally, the book is mentioned and a new acquaintance quickly jumps in: “I heard about that book! What a terrible thing she has done! She went on the View, now this is what society will think of us!” Another friend piped in: “You need to take that book and her with a grain of salt, I heard she is crazy.” When asked whether or not they would read the book a few laughed and agreed they would never. It’s amazing in the past few months, how many similar conversations I have had since.
That Saturday night, I bought the book. I read it from cover to cover. How could I criticize this woman’s story without having even read her book? Maybe the way she promoted her book was wrong to some; maybe some of the details of her memory are flawed? It’s very possible. But how is the issue of telling her personal experience so wrong? If she had stayed on the derech, would you have listened to her then?
The true shonda here is that instead of listening to her narrative, fear that her story will somehow corrupt or alter the Jewish way of life, has prevented many from realizing genuine and significant problematic issues within the Jewish Community, such as, pedophilia, abuse, homosexuality, sexual dysfunction and education (just to name a few) that are brought up in the book.
The worst part is that there are scarce resources available to those who encounter these issues. Even recently, there was a story on CBS New Yorks website entitled: Victim’s Father Determined to break Cycle of Abuse In Brooklyn Hasidic, Orthodox Communities about a father who is being shunned within his community for standing up for his son against a well-known pedophile. Unfortunately, there is very little help available to those who are victims of abuse, and even less for people willing to fight for them.
Why is there a bigger outcry against Deborah Feldman than the Pedophiles who perpetrate such crimes within the Jewish Community? Where is the outrage? Don’t believe that there is a HUGE problem with pedophilia and child abuse within the Jewish community? There are good odds that you know someone who was abused or sexually abused by a family friend or a family member. Fifty-Six percent of pedophiles who commit acts of sexual violence know their victims or the victim’s family (Darkness to the Light, 2010). You have a temper tantrum that a woman writes a book about her personal experience, but you cannot face the issue of child abuse within our own community?
Back to my friend who told me she had heard that Deborah was crazy and that I needed to take her with a “grain of salt”. How on earth is she crazy? She is certainly not crazy being the offspring from her mentally disabled father and her mother, who really had had no option but to leave. That is not her fault. She is not crazy because she had an aunt who made her life miserable. She is not crazy for being raised by her grandparents. She is not crazy for not knowing enough about her body to have sexual relations, and she is not crazy for wanting to read. She is not insane for hating her mother-in-law, who tormented her, and she is not insane for getting a sexual disease from her ex-husband’s marital infidelity. In fact, her writing shows otherwise and the foul reaction to her book only gives new meaning to her written experiences. This woman escaped a life that was truly awful for her and as Jews we have an obligation to prevent stories like this. This is the shonda.
Fear can play a powerful role in one’s life. Perhaps if the Jewish Community faced these issues head on instead of fighting the people who expose shameful truths, we would be in a much better place and not faltering in the shadow of a book.
Helpful Information:
· Darkness to Light: End Child Abuse, http://www.d2l.org
· Adkan: Jewish Advocates for Survivors of Sexual Abuse, http://www.adkanenough.com/index.html
· Project Kol Tzedek, http://www.brooklynda.org/kol_tzedek/Kol%20Tzedek%20Brochure%20Design%202009-%202.pdf
· Gotta Give ‘em Hope, http://gottagivemhope.blogspot.com/p/resources.html
That Saturday night, I bought the book. I read it from cover to cover. How could I criticize this woman’s story without having even read her book? Maybe the way she promoted her book was wrong to some; maybe some of the details of her memory are flawed? It’s very possible. But how is the issue of telling her personal experience so wrong? If she had stayed on the derech, would you have listened to her then?
The true shonda here is that instead of listening to her narrative, fear that her story will somehow corrupt or alter the Jewish way of life, has prevented many from realizing genuine and significant problematic issues within the Jewish Community, such as, pedophilia, abuse, homosexuality, sexual dysfunction and education (just to name a few) that are brought up in the book.
The worst part is that there are scarce resources available to those who encounter these issues. Even recently, there was a story on CBS New Yorks website entitled: Victim’s Father Determined to break Cycle of Abuse In Brooklyn Hasidic, Orthodox Communities about a father who is being shunned within his community for standing up for his son against a well-known pedophile. Unfortunately, there is very little help available to those who are victims of abuse, and even less for people willing to fight for them.
Why is there a bigger outcry against Deborah Feldman than the Pedophiles who perpetrate such crimes within the Jewish Community? Where is the outrage? Don’t believe that there is a HUGE problem with pedophilia and child abuse within the Jewish community? There are good odds that you know someone who was abused or sexually abused by a family friend or a family member. Fifty-Six percent of pedophiles who commit acts of sexual violence know their victims or the victim’s family (Darkness to the Light, 2010). You have a temper tantrum that a woman writes a book about her personal experience, but you cannot face the issue of child abuse within our own community?
Back to my friend who told me she had heard that Deborah was crazy and that I needed to take her with a “grain of salt”. How on earth is she crazy? She is certainly not crazy being the offspring from her mentally disabled father and her mother, who really had had no option but to leave. That is not her fault. She is not crazy because she had an aunt who made her life miserable. She is not crazy for being raised by her grandparents. She is not crazy for not knowing enough about her body to have sexual relations, and she is not crazy for wanting to read. She is not insane for hating her mother-in-law, who tormented her, and she is not insane for getting a sexual disease from her ex-husband’s marital infidelity. In fact, her writing shows otherwise and the foul reaction to her book only gives new meaning to her written experiences. This woman escaped a life that was truly awful for her and as Jews we have an obligation to prevent stories like this. This is the shonda.
Fear can play a powerful role in one’s life. Perhaps if the Jewish Community faced these issues head on instead of fighting the people who expose shameful truths, we would be in a much better place and not faltering in the shadow of a book.
Helpful Information:
· Darkness to Light: End Child Abuse, http://www.d2l.org
· Adkan: Jewish Advocates for Survivors of Sexual Abuse, http://www.adkanenough.com/index.html
· Project Kol Tzedek, http://www.brooklynda.org/kol_tzedek/Kol%20Tzedek%20Brochure%20Design%202009-%202.pdf
· Gotta Give ‘em Hope, http://gottagivemhope.blogspot.com/p/resources.html
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Cinco De Mayo
A long time ago, I once was a staff member of a Teen Trip to Israel. After one of those long hikes, with complaining teens, we arrive at a nice hotel in Jerusalem. The kids are all happy (the kibbutz hotel was not good enough for these kids) and they are tired (YES) and getting ready to go to bed. Then, from out of no where, mass chaos erupts. A bus load of teenage boys and girls from Mexico City emerge from their late night activity, screaming and running around like crazy. They invade my girl's rooms. Bras, underwear,shirts (basically everything) tossed around their hotel.There went that peaceful night's sleep...
More recently, we visited Progreso and Cozumel, Mexico. Progreso was pretty empty. We did a little trip to some Mayan ruins. It was interesting, but somewhat disappointing. Bonus: climbing on Mayan ruins (it's allowed). Negative: No food, kinda boring history after listening to it for over 20 minutes.
Cozumel, on the other hand, was amazing. The port was large, it was easy to get around and there was so much to do. Beautiful weather always equals the beach. We went to a place called Mr. Sanchos. Mr. Sanchos had all you can eat (and good veggie) Mexican food. They had an aqua fun park, jet skiing, boat rentals, on beach massages, snorkel and diving rentals (they even made their own underwater Mayan ruins to attract fish), cabanas, a pool (the pool had a bar and table & stools within it!) and nice bathrooms. I could not ask for more. The day was beautiful and affordable. People were nice and there were lockers... so perfect. If you ever go to Cozumel, I highly recommend this place.
We left enough time to head into the port area for some shopping. We didn't so much dig it, though if we really wanted to, I am sure we could have found something. In the downtown area we found signs (and followed them) to the Beit Chabad. So random, but so cool. We met with the Rabbi there and even encountered some Israelis who ignored us as soon as we entered the building (wow!). The Rabbi was super nice and offered drinks and some good conversation. The house was decked out with beautiful art. You never know when you will run into places like that. They also do have a kosher restaurant to eat in Cozumel, so for those who are concerned...it's awesome!
More recently, we visited Progreso and Cozumel, Mexico. Progreso was pretty empty. We did a little trip to some Mayan ruins. It was interesting, but somewhat disappointing. Bonus: climbing on Mayan ruins (it's allowed). Negative: No food, kinda boring history after listening to it for over 20 minutes.
We left enough time to head into the port area for some shopping. We didn't so much dig it, though if we really wanted to, I am sure we could have found something. In the downtown area we found signs (and followed them) to the Beit Chabad. So random, but so cool. We met with the Rabbi there and even encountered some Israelis who ignored us as soon as we entered the building (wow!). The Rabbi was super nice and offered drinks and some good conversation. The house was decked out with beautiful art. You never know when you will run into places like that. They also do have a kosher restaurant to eat in Cozumel, so for those who are concerned...it's awesome!
OK enough with the talk!!!! So, what is a Jew To Do? Grab your favorite Corona, eat and celebrate because it is.... Cinco De Mayo time!
I have no idea what the hell this video is about...but hey, why not.
- Latin Americans know how to have fun. We have all seen the fancy Latin dances
- They know how to hit the pinata.
- Did you know that Jews first arrived in South America with Cortes? Jews have been in South America since 1492 (Jewish Virtual Library). A little history was never a bad thing. Still interested? Click here to learn about What Jews are doing in other South American Countries.
- Corn chips, Salsa, Guacamole, Tacos, Burritos, Beans, Rice, Cheese, Sour cream...Holy shit, how can you not like Mexican food? Maybe try this Kugel, with a Mexican Food twist (After all, Cinco de Mayo does fall on Shabbat this year).
Monday, April 9, 2012
So, It's Passover. Now what?
I refuse to start with a lame Passover Joke. I will not tell you the one about the nice blind man who is given a piece of Matzah and then attempts to read it. I have not found any jokes even worth posting . Someone needs to come up with something different and not so outdated. Anyways if you have a good joke to share, please do.
The seders have come and gone and now you’re left with time. Lots and Lots of time. Some people love it and others, not so much. Some of us are down for the seder but once it comes to the week that follows we just cannot bear what’s to come: A week of Matzah Pizza, Matzah Brie and Passover Seder recipes which get old very quickly.
Now, while it may seem like complaining, I am not. I actually am getting to like this Holiday and its crazy rules. If you cannot beat it, join it. Give in. There is plenty to do and make. I have put together a short List of stuff to do:
Why wait a year, when you can prepare for your next seder now? All you need is some extra fabric, some of those cool iron on seem makers (I do not know exactly what it is called, but it is the same thing that Ikea used and you can find it at your neighborhood craft shop). You can also do it the old fashioned way with a sewing needle and thread. Make that Matzah and afrikomon bags you never got to make as a kid. For the arikomon bag- measure one piece of fabric so it wraps over the matzah. Fold the piece in half – sew the sides and there you go. Buy some fabric pens and puffy paint and go crazy. Do the same with the matzah bag but you will need two long pieces and fold in half. Sew up the sides.
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| The husband busy making his own Matzah bag |
Give your Hagaddah a makeover. We got those free Maxwell Haggadah for our seder. As one of our projects for this week, we are going to give those covers a makeover and make them our own. We may use leftover fabric from our project above or start with some fancy paper adding some fun stuff we find at our local craft shop. So much possibility! If you do this please submit pictures and tell us how it went!
Make some yummy Meringues. All you need is 2 egg whites and a cup of brown sugar. Whip the egg whites for about 5-10 minutes into white, glossy and foamy. Add brown sugar 1 TBSP at a time until the mixture is completely integrated and looks smooth and glossy about 5 minutes more. Fold (Do not stir) in 1 tspn of maple syrup or some chocolate chips or walnuts if you wish. Bake at 250F for 40 minutes. No joke these cookies are awesome.
Find a good flourless chocolate cake recipe- Seriously you cannot go wrong with one. You can see our cake to the right.
Have recipes and crafts? Please share!!!
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Why Moishe Oofnick Downed the Manischewitz
Purim: You get to dress up, you get to drink, you eat cookies in the shape of a pointed hat or technically the shape of Haman’s pointy ears (has anyone considered how weird this is? We celebrate a holiday by eating a tasty cookie based on the evil villain’s ear shape? What’s the filling supposed to be? Ears wax?) And then it’s over.
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| Moishe Oofnick gets hammered during his seder |
Passover is the Jewish spring cleaning. Literally, you are told to clean up and go through the stuff growing in the back of your fridge. We only have a few more days to go and if you are like me you may be slightly procrastinating. So I say give in to the procrastination and I will even be so kind to give you some tools to procrastinate with. Let’s start with you clicking here: Somewhat entertaining Passover video lacking humor. You can also click here for an oldie but goodie.
What would be a Passover bitch session without some Jew-To-Do fun? Below are a few recipes to keep you busy and a few crazy bonus items as well:
What would be a Passover bitch session without some Jew-To-Do fun? Below are a few recipes to keep you busy and a few crazy bonus items as well:
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| Mmmm. Passover. |
- Go ahead and throw your matzah out the window...You will love this Flourless Chocolate Cake Recipe!
- Of course you can always go the chocolate covered route- chocolate covered strawberries or bananas. Just do not buy "Real Chocolate" brand chocolate. Any brand that needs to call their chocolate real chocolate, is not real chocolate.
- You can also try out this cookie recipe. You may be surprised with how much you like flourless desserts!
Friday, March 16, 2012
Do Jews Wear Green?
Let's start off with some Singles Adds from Israel
Worried about in-law meddling? I'm an orphan! Write. POB74.
Yeshiva bochur, Torah scholar, long beard, payos. Seeks same in woman. POB 71.
Desperately seeking shmoozing! Retired senior citizen desires female companion 70+ for kvetching, kvelling, and krechtzing. Under 30 is also OK. POB 64
Attractive Jewish woman, 35, college graduate, seeks successful Jewish Prince Charming to get me out of my parents' house. POB 46
Divorced Jewish man, seeks partner to attend shule with, light Shabbos candles, celebrate holidays, build Sukkah together, attend brisses, bar mitzvahs. Religion not important. PB 658
Female graduate student, studying kaballah, Zohar, exorcism of dybbuks, seeks mensch. No weirdos, please. POB 56
Israeli professor, 41, with 18 years of teaching in my behind. Looking for American-born woman who speaks English very good. POB 555
I am a sensitive Jewish prince whom you can open your heart to. Share your innermost thoughts and deepest secrets. Confide in me. I'll understand your insecurities. No fatties, please. POB 86.
Though my New Orleans Post will have to wait, I thought I would update today’s post in honor of St. Patrick’s Day. Before you get your TzitTzit in a twist, we will be giving St. Patty’s day a Jewish spin. I saw you on Purim…I saw you on Simcha Torah… Stop rolling your eyes and give in to all that’s green and alcoholic. Don’t even start with the “I do not celebrate St. Patrick’s Day” and the “ Oh it’s not Jewish- I’m not celebrating a Saint” . If you like to drink, you love it. If you love beer you love it. If you love the Irish accent you love it. Don’t even lie that you do not like the Irish accent.
What’s a Jew to Do’s Guide to St. Patrick’s Day:
· Let’s start this off my mentioning the Jewish Community in Ireland. Yes Jews do live in Ireland.
· Irish + Jews have made babies and unfortunately this may or may not have been one of these babies
· No matter what this tune will stay in your head. PS I want this guy’s hat. See you tree of Tursday.
· Celebrate St. Patty’s Day with a drink of two at your local Kiddush club. Don’t prefer that road? Go home and blame it on the Irish.
· After Shabbat (Motzi Shabbat) go crazy. I mean it. Buy some green coloring. Make green pizza. Green cake. Green drinks. Green Bagels. Green cookies. Let your imagination go wild.
I think this will conclude my list for now. If you ever get the chance you should totally visit Ireland. It's beautiful. Everything is lush and green and there is so much to do! The food is fine ( the fish is really good!) The music is fun and the pubs are nice. Dublin has a lot going on ...What are you doing to celebrate?
Friday, February 24, 2012
Hurry UP It’s almost shabbos Well shabbat...
There is a story going around about a local Jew, a great scholar who has the custom of wishing everybody he meets on Shabbos with a hearty "Gut Shabbos".
Of course, being that he is also very pious and devout he does not really look at the recipients of his greeting, for fear this individual may be someone immodestly attired.
So he was once observed walking on Shabbos and not looking up, as usual, greeted the approaching individual with his usual hearty "Gut Shabbos". The telephone pole was only too captivated to respond...
So he was once observed walking on Shabbos and not looking up, as usual, greeted the approaching individual with his usual hearty "Gut Shabbos". The telephone pole was only too captivated to respond...
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