Cinco De Mayo

A long time ago, I once was a staff member of a Teen Trip to Israel. After one of those long hikes, with complaining teens, we arrive at a nice hotel in Jerusalem. The kids are all happy (the kibbutz hotel was not good enough for these kids) and they are tired (YES) and getting ready to go to bed. Then, from out of no where, mass chaos erupts. A bus load of teenage boys and girls from Mexico City emerge from their late night activity, screaming and running around like crazy. They invade my girl's rooms. Bras, underwear,shirts (basically everything) tossed around their hotel.There went that peaceful night's sleep... 


More recently, we visited Progreso and Cozumel, Mexico. Progreso was pretty empty. We did a little trip to some Mayan ruins. It was interesting, but somewhat disappointing. Bonus: climbing on Mayan ruins (it's allowed). Negative: No food, kinda boring history after listening to it for over 20 minutes. 

Cozumel, on the other hand, was amazing. The port was large, it was easy to get around and there was so much to do. Beautiful weather always equals the beach. We went to a place called Mr. Sanchos. Mr. Sanchos had all you can eat (and good veggie) Mexican food. They had an aqua fun park, jet skiing, boat rentals, on beach massages, snorkel and diving rentals (they even made their own underwater Mayan ruins to attract fish),  cabanas, a pool (the pool had a bar and table & stools within it!) and nice bathrooms. I could not ask for more. The day was beautiful and affordable. People were nice and there were lockers... so perfect. If you ever go to Cozumel, I highly recommend this place. 

We left enough time to head into the port area for some shopping. We didn't so much dig it, though if we really wanted to, I am sure we could have found something. In the downtown area we found signs (and followed them) to the Beit Chabad. So random, but so cool. We met with the Rabbi there and even encountered some Israelis who ignored us as soon as we entered the building (wow!). The Rabbi was super nice and offered drinks and some good conversation. The house was decked out with beautiful art. You never know when you will run into places like that. They also do have a kosher restaurant to eat in Cozumel, so for those who are concerned...it's awesome!

OK enough with the talk!!!! So, what is a Jew To Do? Grab your favorite Corona, eat and celebrate because it is.... Cinco De Mayo time!

I have no idea what the hell this video is about...but hey, why not. 

• Latin Americans know how to have fun. We have all seen the fancy Latin dances
• They know how to hit the pinata.

• Did you know that Jews first arrived in South America with Cortes? Jews have been in South America since 1492 (Jewish Virtual Library). A little history was never a bad thing. Still interested? Click here to learn about What Jews are doing in other South American Countries. 
• Corn chips, Salsa, Guacamole, Tacos, Burritos, Beans, Rice, Cheese, Sour cream...Holy shit, how can you not like Mexican food? Maybe try this Kugel, with a Mexican Food twist (After all, Cinco de Mayo does fall on Shabbat this year).

So, It's Passover. Now what?

I refuse to start with a lame Passover Joke. I will not tell you the one about the nice blind man who is given a piece of Matzah and then attempts to read it. I have not found any jokes even worth posting . Someone needs to come up with something different and not so outdated. Anyways if you have a good joke to share, please do.

The seders have come and gone and now you’re left with time. Lots and Lots of time. Some people love it and others, not so much.  Some of us are down for the seder but once it comes to the week that follows we just cannot bear what’s to come: A week of Matzah Pizza, Matzah Brie and Passover Seder recipes which get old very quickly.

Now, while it may seem like complaining, I am not. I actually am getting to like this Holiday and its crazy rules. If you cannot beat it, join it. Give in. There is plenty to do and make. I have put together a short List of stuff to do:

 

The husband busy making his own Matzah  bag

Why wait a year, when you can prepare for your next seder now? All you need is some extra fabric, some of those cool iron on seem makers (I do not know exactly what it is called, but it is the same thing that Ikea used and you can find it at your neighborhood craft shop). You can also do it the old fashioned way with a sewing needle and thread. Make that Matzah and afrikomon bags you never got to make as a kid. For the arikomon bag- measure one piece of fabric so it wraps over the matzah. Fold the piece in half – sew the sides and there you go. Buy some fabric pens and puffy paint and go crazy. Do the same with the matzah bag but you will need two long pieces and fold in half. Sew up the sides.

Give your Hagaddah a makeover. We got those free Maxwell Haggadah for our seder. As one of our projects for this week, we are going to give those covers a makeover and make them our own. We may use leftover fabric from our project above or start with some fancy paper adding some fun stuff we find at our local craft shop. So much possibility! If you do this please submit pictures and tell us how it went!

Make some yummy Meringues. All you need is 2 egg whites and a cup of brown sugar.  Whip the egg whites for about 5-10 minutes into white, glossy and foamy. Add brown sugar 1 TBSP at a time until the mixture is completely integrated and looks smooth and glossy about 5 minutes more. Fold (Do not stir) in 1 tspn of maple syrup or some chocolate chips or walnuts if you wish.  Bake at 250F for 40 minutes. No joke these cookies are awesome.

Find a good flourless chocolate cake recipe- Seriously you cannot go wrong with one. You can see our cake to the right.

Have recipes and crafts? Please share!!!

Why Moishe Oofnick Downed the Manischewitz

Purim: You get to dress up, you get to drink, you eat cookies in the shape of a pointed hat or technically the shape of Haman’s pointy ears (has anyone considered how weird this is? We celebrate a holiday by eating a tasty cookie based on the evil villain’s ear shape? What’s the filling supposed to be? Ears wax?)   And then it’s over.

Moishe Oofnick gets hammered during his seder

Then it happens. Passover advertisements, Passover parodies and the Ten Commandments and the Prince of Egypt on replay- it’s here! Now there are different levels of craziness and I have sure you have heard of it all.  I have seen someone take a toothbrush to their floor. Hells no. Crazy people in Brooklyn burning their freaking houses and apartment buildings to the ground looking for chametz- or a few bread crumbs.  

Passover is the Jewish spring cleaning. Literally, you are told to clean up and go through the stuff growing in the back of your fridge.  We only have a few more days to go and if you are like me you may be slightly procrastinating. So I say give in to the procrastination and I will even be so kind to give you some tools to procrastinate with. Let’s start with you clicking here: Somewhat entertaining Passover video lacking humor. You can also click here for an oldie but goodie. 


What would be a Passover bitch session without some Jew-To-Do fun? Below are a few recipes to keep you busy and a few crazy bonus items as well:

Mmmm. Passover.

• Go ahead and throw your matzah out the window...You will love this Flourless Chocolate Cake Recipe!
• Of course you can always go the chocolate covered route- chocolate covered strawberries or bananas. Just do not buy "Real Chocolate" brand chocolate. Any brand that needs to call their chocolate real chocolate, is not real chocolate.  
• You can also try out this cookie recipe. You may be surprised with how much you like flourless desserts!

Worst Passover pick up line: Want to Wander in my Desert? (Lame Lame Lame)